Nth Time

How many times did I look at my phone to check if he called...
Nth time.

How many times I texted and waited for a response...
Nth time.

How many hours did I wait because he said he's going to come over...
Nth time.

How many times I told myself he is not mine...
Nth time.

How many times I wish I can hold him whenever I want...
Nth time.

How many times I refuse to believe he has a band on his finger, goes home to his wife, and doesn't care for me as much...
A Thousand nth time.

:-(